Friday, April 13, 2018

A to Z Blogging Challenge: L is for Loving Community #singlenessmyth#13

My A to Z Challenge is a blog about singleness.  Some myths, some thoughts, some of the things I have been learning as 30 something year old single American woman, in a culture that sees this as something that is less than... join me on this journey! 

L is for Loving Community.  Singleness Myth #13:  You can only have community with other singles if you are single. 

Here's the thing.... this may seem like the stupidest thing you have ever heard, but I have actually seen it happen before my very eyes.  I have seen single people not get invited to places, and become this little secret society of only single people.  Everyone is at fault here in my opinion.  We as single people, and the married people as well.  We have to branch out of our boxes. 

Yes, it is easy to call that friend that has kids the same age as you, and drink lemonade while your kids play at the park.  You know what though, your single friend that doesn't have any kids would also like to be invited to that conversation.  I bet she would be there in a heartbeat if you invited her. 

Same goes with single people.  Why do we think that our married friends don't want to be friends with us anymore.  Probably because they keep saying they are busy.  Here's the deal though, eventually they will say yes.  Everyone does.  Don't give up on them, keep calling, keep asking.  They really do care, we just sometimes get in our own heads, and create false stories about how other people feel. 

We need each other.  We need community around us, of all kinds.  We need people that are going to call us or message us to ask us how we are doing.  We need that as humans.  We need to know that we are loved and cared for.  If we are only surrounding ourselves with one type of person, then we are missing out on some pretty epic conversations and friendships.  We are missing out on the kind of community that we are supposed to have. 

So, stop just surrounding yourself with people like you... branch out... invite someone to dinner, or to hang out with your group of married friends.  Ask people to join  you even if it is hard, even if you think they might say no.  Because you never know your best friend might just be waiting for you around the corner, and wouldn't it stink if you never got the chance to connect because you were too afraid of what you don't know or don't remember? 

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