This is it the first day of the year 2015. I never thought that these last 5 years would fly by as quickly as they have. I just can't seem to believe how fast time is going. I wish it would slow down a little bit. I'm excited to be writing again, and am making it my personal goal to post something on my blog everyday...no matter what! I want this year to be full of positive thoughts and want to be able at the end of this year to see transformation. Transformation into the person that I want to become. No longer a person that sees things negatively, or allows those around me to bring m
e down. I want to be a person that loves, lives and laughs ALL the TIME! I am so tired of complaining. I am tired of people not getting along. No longer will I live this in place of negativity and despair.
Sometimes I think back to who I was in college, and wonder if I could find that girl again. That girl that knew exactly what she wanted from life. That girl that wasn't afraid of the future, wasn't afraid to take risks or let her heart be crushed. Where did that girl go? Somewhere along the way she got lost. Somewhere along the way she got caught up in wanting to be who everyone else wanted her to be. Somewhere along the way she got caught up in the words that were spoken to her and about her by others. We all judge, every single day we judge. We can't help it....its part of human nature. But I am going to choose not to anymore. I am going to choose the positive. I am going to choose to give without expecting in return. To use words that lift people up instead of tearing them down. I am going to choose to not take things personally.
Am I going to be perfect??? NO....because I am human, I am flawed.....I will have moments of self-doubt. I will have moments when my courage just isn't enough. But I will choose to keep going. I will choose to look at the side that helps instead of harms. I will choose light instead of darkness.
I will choose to love instead of hate...everytime...not matter what is said about me or done to me. Because at the end of the day I am who I am. I can't change for you...I can only change for myself. Sometimes I will and sometimes I won't. But I will choose to love. I will choose to forgive and I will choose to be positive.
I bought a planner for myself. I am super excited about it. I know that it is going to be a great tool to keep me balanced and on task. I have set daily, weekly, monthly and yearly goals for myself. Without these I think I would get lost in this world of chaos. A chaos that is hard to understand. A chaos that I can't control.
So...here's to organized chaos. A chance to change what I feel like has been a negative past few years. Here's to good choices and good people. Here's to a positive life! Living, loving, hoping and dreaming!