A Year of No Spending.... Life changes take 2

My original post was going to actually be on this topic, then I ended up writing about immigration, and I didn't feel like those two things belonged together. 


I am getting ready to move, and I feel like there has been a common theme surrounding this move.  The theme is "GET RID  OF THE CRAP!" 


I could be considered a hoarder in some areas of my life for sure. I am definitely an impulsive buyer.  I will spend money on something and then it will sit for days, weeks, months, or even years.  In fact some things that I have bought I have just never even used or opened.  Or I will buy something like paintbrushes, and then put them somewhere safe, only to need them again and I can't find them.  Then I will buy more because they are only $5.00!  Ha! 


So, about a month or so ago, my friend told me about a book I should read... maybe you have heard of it...


Cait Flanders is the author. I actually have a couple more on my list to read as well before I embark on this journey.  But I am going to embark on this journey. 


A year of no spending. 


I haven't decided on all the rules I am going to abide by, but I have decided I am going to do it.  Mostly because I just have too much crap.  I had to have a storage unit this past year, with stuff in it, that I didn't even look twice at for a year. Now.... if I haven't used it in a year... do I really need it? 


Even the keepsakes, I am just becoming less and less attached to.  Like do I really need to keep all the scrapbooks that I made for my junior high/high school/college days?  Sure they are fun to get out every once in awhile, but I mean come on....  who is going to want to keep those when I leave this earth?  Probably no one! 


So...I am getting prepared for this year of no spending.  It doesn't mean that I am not going to go out, it doesn't mean that I am not going to spend any money at all.  It just means that I am going to say good-bye to the things that I spend money on that I don't actually need.  Like craft supplies, and Starbucks.  Things that I could make myself for a whole lot cheaper. 


I don't want to have to have a storage unit to store my stuff.  I want to be able to pack it all up if I need to and go.  Why do I need boxes and boxes of stuff?  What's the point? 


So.... the first step is getting rid of a bunch of stuff.  The next step is not buying stuff that I don't need.  The third step is investing in travel, paying off bills, and people instead of stuff. 


Check back for updates on my journey! 


I am excited!  I don't have an official launch date, but it is coming! 

Life Changes.... where do I stand?

I've tried to be kind of quiet on FB these days, just because I feel like I am constantly bombarded with things that make my skin crawl, and turn my stomach inside out.  There are some pretty big changes about to happen in my life this next month. I am switching to the Jeff City  location, and moving in to a new apartment in Jeff City.  A couple months ago I felt like God was making some big changes in my life, but I didn't know exactly what those were going to be and where it would take me.  I was prepared to move across the ocean.  I was prepared to step way outside of my comfort zone, but turns out that He wants me here for awhile.  I had also been feeling like He was changing my church location.  I didn't know where  He was going to move me to, but I felt it, and I kept pushing back against it. 


Until I had the realization that maybe my journey needs to be somewhere else.  It isn't anything against where I am currently attending, volunteering and majorly involved.  I think that my heart is just being moved.  For me I need to be in a place where people are standing up for kids that are being torn away from their parents.  For me I need to be in a place that is going to take a stand against hate.  Take a strong stand against injustice.  You see I don't need all the information to know that what is happening isn't right.  I don't need to know all the laws, and all the ins and outs.  I just need to know that kids are being taken from their parents, for seeking asylum.  For seeking refuge.  I just need to know that love isn't winning in order for me to stand up for what I believe to be right.  What I believe to be the way of love, grace, and mercy. 


I will never be a typical American.  Living overseas for 5 years changed me.  It changed my heart, it changed the way that I view the world, and it gave me a new perspective.  It changed my loyalty.  I became loyal to Christ first, before any country, flag, or anthem.  I became loyal to loving people, all people instead of only seeing the needs in my own country.  I would never choose the life of an American over someone from another country, just because they are American.  It's not how He has created me to be.  That character trait alone, will cause some people to hate me, and I am okay with that.  It could even put my life in danger, and I am okay with that.  Because when I get to where I am going next, I don't want to say.... well I thought that you created Americans better.  Nope, I want to say... I loved everyone just as you would have.  I treated everyone with the same compassion, love, and grace that you would have.  I put my loyalty in you, my faith in you, and trusted that you were where my heart should lean towards.


My comfort zone is not inside the walls of this country.  My comfort zone doesn't stop at someone who can only speak English.  I don't feel distain for those that are trying to run away from the various hardships that they are faced with on a daily basis.  I don't look at myself as better than them, because I was born here and they were born into poverty.  I don't want to spew hate towards those that believe differently than I do.  Towards those that come from a different culture, a different religion.  I would choose anyone of them to be my neighbor, even if it meant that none of my friends or family agreed with me, or chose to visit me. 


So, as I ponder where my heart is being led, and what that could mean for my future.  I stop and pray everyday that we, no really that I never lose sight of who God has called me to be.  My voice isn't really heard very much, but I am going to keep speaking it.  I am going to continue to be a voice for those that are being treated with hate and discrimination.  I don't think laws should be broken, but you know what?  I also don't think people anywhere in the world should be forced to live in conditions that are causing them to die, or get murdered. 


I won't walk around blindly, just because someone spews a few Bible verses here are there.  Actions speak louder than words, and I for one would prefer that my actions, my words, and my beliefs all match. 


So.... I get ready for the next steps in my journey. I get ready to stand up more, speak out more, and love a whole lot more.  I get ready to put aside my bias, and try to do what I can to make this world, this country a better place for everyone. 


My hope and comfort is that nothing is impossible for Him.... nothing. 

Sometimes You Have to Just Say Yes

I'm pretty well known for my sense of adventure, and moves across the world.  It is kind of what I do.  So, when I found myself in Columbia, Missouri for going on a 5th year, in July I wondered what the future might hold.  It wasn't that I was doubting God, or wanting to flee, probably for the first time in a long time I was content with staying.  It was just that I knew there was something more.  I felt it.  I knew that this year was just a transition year.  That things were changing.  I think my first sign of change came when I lost some friendships that were really important to me.  They were friends that I thought were going to be there for a very LONG time, and instead they were kind of just taken away.  Then next I just got this feeling of being unsettled in my current place.

I am all about looking for ways to embrace life, and be a bigger part of my community.  I have absolutely LOVED volunteering for all the events that CoMo has to offer, and being a part of this amazing work environment.



So when moving to JC came up, I just decided it was what I should do.  Knowing that I would be commuting 3 days out of the week, it wasn't a bad thing at all.  In fact I was looking forward to the time in the car.  But the more I thought about it and prayed about I felt this tug that there were more changes on the horizon. 


So applied to a couple jobs in JC.... and I got one. 


The difference in this than any other time before is that it just seemed so easy.  I'm not second guessing myself.  I'm not wondering what would happen if I stayed.  I'm not thinking that I am ruining my life.  Maybe it is because I am only moving a half hour away and every other time I have moved it has been across the freaking ocean.  Maybe. 


But this time just feels different.  It feels like I am on the verge of some great things.  It feels like I am getting ready to embark on this grand adventure that even I am not ready for. 


Sometimes you have to say yes to things that you are unsure of.  You say yes because you just know that it is the right thing.  You say yes because God's ways are SO much bigger than your ways. 


I don't know what this next year has in store.  But I sure am excited about it! 

Grace.... and why I need it....

I have a lot to get done in the next few weeks.  Next week I am leading a class for Kid's Club, on top of working my full time job.  That means that I will be gone from 7:20 AM till 9:00 PM everyday.  It is going to be a fun week, but I already know that I am going to be exhausted. 

The past 2 weeks have had some really big ups and downs.  I have been able to process a lot of it though, and realized where my mistakes were, and perhaps understood a little bit more of why things had to happen the way that they did.  I still don't like it, and I wish that I would have made better decisions a long the way, but ultimately I know that it happened the way it needed to, so that I could learn a few lessons. 

I am doing the #100daysofgodspromises book from Dayspring. 

It arrived today, and I am already loving it! 

Today's topic was grace. 

Why do I need God's grace? 

I need God's grace because I am horrible at loving others.  I need God's grace because I am constantly judging, being sassy, looking down on, and ruining what God could be doing if I would let Him. 

I need God's grace because on my own I mess up a lot. 

A couple of weeks ago I had someone betray me probably in one of the worst ways that anyone has ever betrayed me before.  I really didn't want to give this person any kind of grace.  And if I am honest I still don't actually.  This person basically took my heart, and trust and stomped all over them.  I know that this person probably doesn't even care that they hurt me.  They were just playing their cards, keeping me on the side just in case something else didn't work out.  I get why they did it.  It doesn't mean that I agree or like it one bit.  But I get it. 

It's hard for me in instances like that to understand grace, and how to give grace, while still keeping boundaries.  But you know what grace doesn't mean that people get to do whatever they want, right? 

God's grace isn't even like that.  Yes, He gives me grace.  My weaknesses are made strong through that grace.  But that doesn't mean that His grace is a free ticket to do whatever I want.  I think that goes with others too.  I can give someone grace without allowing them to damage my heart.  I can love someone with God's grace without allowing them back in my life. 

We give each other grace, but that doesn't mean that we let people act however they want.  Love means boundaries.  This is something that I am just learning.  It would have been more beneficial if I had learned it a long time ago, but sometimes you have to go through some hard things in order to be ready for what God wants to teach you next. 

My next is boundaries and grace.  I'm excited to see how He uses this on my journey.